Uncommon Ground

What a week. You made it through whatever you had envisioned might happen; and then what actually did. How did we do? Are you reminding yourself daily that the resolution for this year was to be kinder to you? Moving more slowly during uncertain times seems to come naturally. This is not laziness, this is your spirit slowing down your racing mind, or trying to. Embrace it. Operate mindfully and pay attention.

The division every single person is feeling right now is not unique. Each occupant of the planet who has access to media, is aware of the salty and bitter climate. Many people have not developed healthy skills to cope with anger, fear and uncertainty. When a person does not know what to do with big emotions they tend to seek out conflict. You can recognize them easily if you are purposely monitoring your own wellness. Their social media posts and comments are aggressive and argumentative, many times not quite on topic and include unnecessary personal attacks.


can be heart wrenching to reminisce on friendships that were once so full of beauty and comfort and fun; but now have turned into irritation and animosity. How can two people who once agreed on so much, now struggle to find any common ground? Is there any salvage?

There is; but likely not today. Today is the day for your energy. When two people are passionately polar, the best course of action is probably a break. This is not an announcement, which would only fuel further defensiveness. This is simply a conscious decision on your part that, until you both have done some more healing and growing, you are more likely to stay centered outside of their sphere.

It can be uncomfortable to change a routine. Having a creative outlet can be a game changer. Most people do not even realize their own ability to create. Many song writers and painters produce the bulk of their work during times of pain. Big emotions produce complex ideas which need a release valve. When working through your feelings and trying to understand them so you can feel better, try doing something else that interests you. Paint, cook, garden, run, sing, sew. It really does not matter as long as you enjoy it.

When we allow another person to be the reason we are upset, we surrender our power. I’m sure the Bible said that it was better for a man to be alone because of this. If we cannot exist in a relationship or friendship without demanding the other person behave in a particular way before we will be able to gain any joy from their presence, then the relationship is not the problem. You are. I am. We are. It is better to be alone than to impart misery on another, or to have them do the same to you. Isn’t it?

Your joy and enjoyment of your own company, will make every other relationship you have flourish. You will find a renewed sense of self love from stepping away from toxic situations and embracing creative outlets.

Look, the sharing of ideas is a precious gift. Healthy debate can be useful. When we truly want to understand a different point of view, it’s a beautiful thing. When a populace of emotionally damaged adults are committed to the flavor of mud they throw and are driven by their anger and fear, interacting it isn’t so useful. Silly question but can you heal another person, or make them understand you exact viewpoint? We all know we cannot. Your relationship with yourself is where it all starts. Without truly knowing yourself, you cannot connect authentically with your Creator, your spouse or your siblings.

This isn’t even some deep truth. When you feel good you are a better contributor to any social situation. When you feel bad, not as much. Feel good on purpose today. Stretch your sore muscles. Paint a rock with your child. Do something that has meaning and that matters. Move with intention to be a happier and kinder contributor. Then when ideas are shared, ulterior motives and loaded rebuttals won’t ruin the progress. When we communicate from a place of openness and love, our voices are truly heard and understood.

Be Authentically You 💚 – Roots to Remedies